holy sheet! panda poo papers path to prosperity

 My god, what is that woman doing to that panda?

Sometimes the headlines just write themselves, eh?

The CBC, your go-to source for all panda-plop monetization scheme updates, has reported that Thailand’s Chiang Mai zoo is selling sheets of beautiful, handmade keepsake paper composed primarily of panda poop. It’s in great demand as a gift item.

“Saw this and thought of you.” How sweet.

When keepers of the country’s panda couple – Chuang Chuang and Lin Hui – tired of disposing the 25 kilograms of feces daily produced by the duo, Prasertsak Buntragulpoontawee came up with the idea of turning it into notebooks, fans, bookmarks and key chains.Pandas just poop too damn much!

“At first the Chinese were very skeptical,” said the head of Chiang Mai Zoo‘s panda unit…But the multicoloured paper products have proven hot selling-items at the zoo, with the the equivalent of about C$9,350 earned to date helping balance the accounts of panda keeping…

Prasertsak said he was inspired by sa paper, or mulberry leaf paper, a traditional, local product which has proven a highly popular gift item in recent years.

“… in the zoo, when people see real pandas and then their product they’re excited and buy.”

I’ll bet. Does Chuck Berry know about this? How about Mark Oaten? I forsee a radical new idea in super-personalized autobiographies…

But has anyone thought of the most obvious application?

TP Panda!

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operation global media domination: sic transit gloria bloggy

TIAAh, how long ago it seems; geological ages ago, fast-vanishing in the rearview mirror of the hurtling cosmos. And yet it was only yesterday that I was the most popular blog of the half-million blogs on WordPress. Today I’m #52 #91. Sigh.

Sic transit gloria bloggy. At least I’m up to 65,000 59,000 on Technorati.

Keith Olbermann, you’ll always have a special place in my heart. A place closer, perhaps, to the part I use to play poker with than the part I use to store actual affection in, but that could all change over drinks sometime. Call me. Although this was far from your finest rant, it was worth a cool three thousand hits in 24 hours.

Salon, I’m going to have to start reading you more often. Link to me again and I may blogroll you; we can work something out. Have your pixels call my pixels. (If my guess is right they follwed me from a Gawker post about Salon’s disingenuous celebrity uterus coverage {gee, even Salon checks their trackbacks; even famous people like to hear what others are saying about them} and on which I blogwhorishly dropped a link to my own blog post about the infamous and unnameable Cthulhu ultrasound. Then they poked around until they discovered Keith. But this is just a theory, and we all know what the mainstream press thinks of Chtulhu-TomKat-BushBashing theories).

Mere moments ago I was linked to in DirtySpoke‘s review of Anal Amy. We shall see if this is better than Olbermann, hitwise. UPDATE: two hits. That would be a no, by a factor of 10 to the third power.

I’m going to let someone Catholic explain all this to Sister Mary Martha. Volunteers?

And in a special bonus section tonight, we’ll answer some questions that popped up via the Search Engine Referrals.

  • Yes, Vic’s diner at the corner of Main and Cordova is closed. No idea when/if it will reopen, but I already miss their sweet Filipino spagetti (sic). Starting December 1, drown your sorrows in Pat’s Pub, where they’ll be serving their own microbrew. Tonight is Redneck Wednesday, with country rock on the stereo and Bud and Jack Boilermakers for $3.75. Apparently the Pacific up by the porn theatre is going to be joining the ranks of microbrewers; hey kids, it’s not just for gourmets anymore!
  • Kimveer Gill is still dead. Time to deal with it; put the black candles and athame down and back away slowly.
  • Steve Irwin also dead. Film will not be shown at eleven, nor at any other time.
  • The Blackzilla video here is NOT the one you’re looking for, people.
  • Lucy Gao still worth a half-dozen hits a day. Someone needs to be looking at freshening their newsgathering methodology.
  • Beautiful Agony Free Samples Not Here!

And now we return you to your regularly scheduled Communal Anarchist, Cthulhoid, short attention span Canuckistani blog.

Happy Thanksgiving, USA!

So I’m early for once in my life. This is worth watching two days in a row; possibly the finest moment in the history of situation comedy.

The WKRP turkey drop.

“As God is my witness, I thought turkeys could fly.”

For those of you who like your Thanksgiving memories with a side of acid, there’s William S. Burroughs’ Thanksgiving Prayer.

quote o’ the day: Mencken on the presidency

Thanks to Archie for this:

 “As democracy is perfected, the office of president represents, more and more closely, the inner soul of the people. On some great and glorious day the plain folks of the land will reach their heart’s desire at last and the White House will be adorned by a downright moron.”
H.L. Mencken

the infamous exploding whale video

You know you want to watch it again! It blowed up so good it got its own commemorative website! Ellee‘s right, someone should remix this to disco or Disney tunes. Paging Moby

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