You know what I love? Fairy tales. You know what I hate? Disney. Oh, it’s not that these bloody-minded tales of Nemesis and warped value systems haven’t been Bowdlerized before, but they have never been Bowdlerized so creepily, yet so insipidly.
(yes, I know this isn’t from Topper, but it’s all I could find)
Well, Snow White is up there when it comes to driveling bubbleheads with irritating, saccharine voices, surely, but at last some musical genius has made her tolerable. Behold the brilliant syncopations of “Wishery” by Pogo, a Pixar employee, and marvel at the unspeakable rendered not simply bearable, but beautiful.
Mostly by giving the dwarves more airtime, it’s true, but whatevs.
Lindsay Lohan confessions of a teenage drama queen
Well, now that Ariel has nearly completed her downfall and is drying up in rehab (yet again), I think the time is right for a little flashback to when it all started to go wrong. Once upon a time it was cokeups and muscleheads, alive, alive-o, and now it’s nothing but orange jumpsuits, enforced Yanni listening sessions and yoga, and the smell of cheap regret.
I always wanted to grow up to be her, and I think I may have finally succeeded. Now to get my hands on that wardrobe!
What I like about her is…seriously, everything. I even dyed my hair red for a couple of years! She takes no prisoners, takes no shit, takes names and kicks ass, and she was right: her daughter married a total dork. Derwood was a feeb. I’m sorry, all you Derwoods or Darvins or Dickwads or Whatevers out there, but you’re just not good enough and it would be cruel to let you go through life in a fog of self-delusion, correct?
Endora would NEVER stoop to psychoactives. Other than Martinis, of course
Do you know the Sedona Method? Its aim is to give insecure, dweebish people a feeling of accomplishment. Regardless of whether or not they have, in fact, accomplished anything.
You can see why Endora and I would have a problem with that, yes? [clue for Derwoods: say Yes]
So, from Endora I have taken my vociferous contempt for the inferior, my belief that if one is magical enough one can get away with anything, and my taste for earrings of true splendiferositude.
Endora enjoys Champagne mainly on the plane over Spain