Puppets are evil. Clown puppets are the very DEFINITION of creepy evil.
You know it. Clown puppets are the absolute definition of creepy evil, and monkey clown puppets? There’s absolutely no word in the English language for the concentrated manifestation of evil which this concept represents. See for yourself:
Need some brain bleach? Here are some Gossip Links of Evil over the jump.
Priorities, Parents
Not to point out the obvious, but has anyone else noticed that the oxytocin rush associated with New Parenthood often results in complete failure of perspective? If I didn’t know better, I’d swear this was ripped from a Kate Hudson/Steve Martin movie. And maybe, some day, it will be.
While we’re dwelling on that (un)happy thought, here are our gossip links for your perusal. I would have put them up yesterday, but apparently Vancouver got kicked off the internet before I got that done.
Paul Rudd covers up his Rudds
Give the man what he asks for: a cure for cancer!
“I know it’s the thought that counts, but…the money counts too!”
Normally, as you know, I am so NOT all about the self-conscious hipsters (apologies: I repeat myself) particularly those of ironic eyewear, but in this case I must give it up to Mister Paul Rudd, who suggests that on your birthday, you ask your friends to donate your age in dollars to the Cancer Society. Now, this may well bankrupt my friends, but you, according to Quantcast, are younger, and you should be doing this. I mean, if they spend that money on PBR you’re just gonna have a beer belly and a hangover to show for it the next day, right? Whereas fighting cancer provides a glow which makes one irresistable to the opposite sex (as several cancer fakers of my acquaintance know and have taken advantage of, and don’t worry, I’ve taken care of them in ways they don’t even know yet).
Am I ranting? Oh, let me rant. I beat cancer: I’m entitled to rant a bit. If you’re feeling ranty right along with me, here are some infuriating, medically-themed gossip links for you to read and ensure that your blood pressure remains elevated. If you get angry enough, it even counts as aerobic!
FOR ASLAN AND FOR NARNIA and also for cheap comedy
In case your grey, humdrum world is entirely bereft of joy and sunshine, here are 50 photos of basset hounds running to brighten your meaningless, pathetic existence. We strongly suggest you shout the above line at the top of your lungs when viewing each image. This will provide both an endorphin rush and needed oxygenation. (h/t SeanCranbury)
If that alone cannot shock you out of your black fog of existential despair, we suggest reading the following gossip links and laughing out loud at the thought that all of these ridonkulous losers are paid far more than you ever will be.
I HAVE to try this. I wonder if I could get the bus all to myself with this.
“Just throw him The Face for awhile!”
Now, on the off chance that you’re short of inspiration for The Face, you can click over the jump and read all of today’s most skeeve-inducing gossip links.
raincoaster 