Osama bin Laden’s latest video message

Here is the latest video from Osama bin Laden, apparently released a few hours ago (Sunday, July 15th) although there is no way of knowing when it was actually recorded. There is some background from LauraMansfield.com:

He himself said ‘By Him in Whose Hands my life is!
I would love to attack and be martyred,
then attack again and be martyred,
then attack again and be martyred.’

Those are the words of Osama Bin Laden in a short clip from a longer As Sahab video.

According to CNN, however, the original video was 40 minutes long instead of the 50 seconds of bin Laden which made it to YouTube. The rest was, essentially, a motivational tape encouraging viewers to think positively of martyrdom as a career choice.

Bin Laden glorified those who die in the name of jihad, or holy war, saying even the Prophet Muhammad “had been wishing to be a martyr.”

“The happy (man) is the one that God has chosen him to be a martyr,” added bin Laden, who was shown outdoors wearing army fatigues and looking tired.

The authenticity of the video could not be verified, but it appeared on a Web site commonly used by Islamic militants and carried the logo of as-Sahab, al-Qaida‘s media production wing. It was not immediately clear when the video of bin Laden was filmed.

Bin Laden was last heard from in a July 1, 2006 audio tape in which he voiced support for the new leader of al-Qaida in Iraq and warned nations not to send troops to fight a hardline Islamic regime that had recently seized power in Somalia.

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so, like, this is a stickup, eh?

GangstersThis just may be the most perfectly Canadian bank robbery of all time. Basic facts stolen from the Peterborough police blotter, plus News of the Weird.

So Christopher Emmorey decides that life in Peterborough is just not exciting enough. I’ve been to Peterborough; I know where he’s coming from. I can sympathize. But unlike Christopher Emmorey, I wouldn’t decide that the remedy was to go knock over a bank.

And why would I not decide that? Well, for one thing there was that advice about bank robbery that the cop gave me; for another, I’m familiar with the way Canadian banks work.

They work like this:

So, he gets in the lineup (there is always a lineup) and he waits obediently and quietly for his turn, probably not so much as playing with the pens, probably not even wrapping those little beaded chains around their stems, because yeah, I’ve noticed I’m the only one that does that. And eventually the tellers work through the line of pensioners, housewives, business customers, and what-have-yous that crowd a bank during banking hours, and he gets up to the wicket, whereupon he makes his polite, yet weapons-referenced demand for some cash:

specifically, $2000.

Guess he didn’t want to be greedy.

The teller, eyelid-batting nowhere in evidence, calmly informed him that, as he was not a regular customer of the bank, he could only get $200, and further that he would have to pay a five dollar service charge. And he agreed.
I’m starting to love this teller. Aren’t you? Even though I know that bitch would ding me double on overdraft charges. I can sort of see a young Margaret Thatcher doing this, had her life taken a slightly different turn.

She gave him the $195, alerted the police who arrested him immediately, and no doubt hasn’t had to pay for her own drinks since.

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a salute to the troops

Canadian Troops

Instead of racking my brains to come up with a (likely inferior) way of expressing my gratitude to the troops overseas, I think I’ll just suggest you read this eloquent letter from Lorrie Goldstein in the Winnipeg Sun. While reading it, I was thinking of a girl I used to babysit, now a mother of three and on her third tour of duty in Afghanistan. And I was thinking of Trevor Greene, still in St Paul’s Hospital, still working on rebuilding his life after an ambush and an axe to the head.

While you are reading this letter, never for one moment forget that the decision to go overseas, to become involved in wars, peacekeeping actions, and all such deployments, is a decision that is made not by military personnel, but by politicians. Direct your own letters and thoughts accordingly.

Given the recent lacklustre support by Toronto City Council for the men and women now serving our nation in Afghanistan, we dedicate today’s editorial celebrating Canada’s 140th birthday to all members of our military.

Thank you for choosing to serve Canada, whether you were born here or came here from another country.

Thank you for deciding that Canada is worth defending, both at home and abroad.

Thank you for being ready to sacrifice everything, not just a safe, comfortable life here at home with your loved ones, but your very lives, if necessary, to protect us and those who are in need of our protection abroad.

To the families of all who serve in our military, thank you for sharing your precious sons, daughters, husbands, wives, mothers, fathers, brothers, sisters, grandchildren, relatives and friends with us.

Like you, we pray they will complete their missions and return home safely to you as soon as possible. Like you, we pray for a just and lasting peace.

To those who face the unimaginable grief on this Canada Day, and every Canada Day to come, of missing the presence of a loved one because they died in the service of their country, know that we are thinking of you today.

That we grieve with you. That we pray for you. And that we will remember those you loved, and what they did for us and to help people they didn’t even know, forever.

To their parents, thank you for raising sons and daughters who willingly answered the call of their country.

We will always think of them as the fine young men and women of military bearing, frozen forever in the flower of youth, that we see in the pictures released upon their deaths.

But we know you remember them in a thousand different ways built up over a lifetime of memories — of lazy summer days, at family celebrations and of how they looked on their first day of school, or on the day they graduated.

To the wives, husbands and children of all those who have made the ultimate sacrifice in the service of their country, we cannot imagine the depth of your loss.

But we share your pride in who they were and like you, we celebrate what they did with their lives, because their lives mattered.

And so on this Canada Day, on our nation’s 140th birthday, we remember them, because they represent what Canada is all about at its very best.

Strong, free, honourable, compassionate — and dedicated to the service of others

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UK news: how to get away with blowing up three cars in a huge fireball without being suspected of terrorism

UPDATE: see Big Bang Blogged Blindly for a full update of the REAL situation. That’s what I get for looking to the Sun for anything but tits.

It’s easy. Just look like Damien‘s little sister here:

Sarah Dean

Story from the Sun, paraphrased here to spare your virgin eyes from sight of the twisted perversions they call Journalism over the pond.

Oh, ho, ho! what a funny our little Sarah pulled! The love! Comely blonde Sarah Dean, who has a silly little job in the travel industry where she has access to passport numbers, passenger lists, flight plans, airport maps, etc, can’t afford posh transport and drives a VW, and we all know that anything lower than a Bentley is a beater, so it’s just nature’s way that the bally thing went and blew itself up [seems not] on June 29th, just one day before the discovery of the car bombs in London and two days before the SUV-based incendiary attack on Glasgow airport; why, the damn thing was in such rough shape that it erupted in what witnesses called “a fireball”[maybe they did and maybe they didn’t but it certainly doesn’t appear to have been a fireball], taking out itself completely, plus destroying the rather solidly-built Porsche sitting beside it, as well as the no-name car on the opposite side. [minor damage to the other two cars, and no explosion] Poor Sarah!

To be serious for a moment, either people with connections to the travel industry who happen to be blowing cars up in the UK are a risk or they are not. Either all such people should be investigated for connections to terrorism, or none should be. I have not the slightest idea of Sarah Dean is a hapless clerk or a terrorist mastermind, but then neither do you. Let this very weird, very peculiarily timed incident be fully investigated. Cars rarely blow up, especially German ones.

A friend of mine, not given to the wearing of tinfoil chapeaux, suggested an interesting explanation for all the virus outbreaks on cruise ships: someone was doing a dry run.

Glasgow suspect arrested

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random morbidity

Haditha

Why is it that when it’s the government that executes someone,
it is never described as “execution-style?”

Stars and Stripes

But it is called the Executive Branch.

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