For those of you who are not familiar with the whole idea of whales, here it is:

They are very, very big.

And they are very, very strong, and they are absolutely impervious to the idea that human lives are sacrosanct.

So, should you care to, say, go scuba diving with whales and crawl on top of a mother and her calf, and she sees fit to connipt slightly, sending you and your buddy on an excruciating, nine-hour journey to the nearest hospital, where you mist up as you give media interviews about how beautiful and Oprah-like the experience was, and how eager you are to repeat it, don’t be surprised if, somewhere out in the depths, the traditional clicks and whistles of whalesong are enlivened with an occasional evil chuckle.

In related news, in possible payback for the ongoing Japanese whale hunt (for “research” purposes, remember, said research resulting in such scientifically advanced products as fast food whale burgers) a lost and apparently confused sperm whale which was being pestered by several boatloads of Japanese fishermen deliberately flipped over one of the boats, resulting in the death of a 58-year-old man. At the time, the man had been engaged in an attempt to direct the whale from the bay in which it had strayed to the open ocean. Japanprobe has two videos and the Reuters report.

Don’t mess with Moby Dick.

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