We all have one, and sometimes we find it in the strangest place:
via SeismicTwitch
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Category Archives: Weird
blog post o’ the day: strangeness
What a surprising topic for our inaugural Blog Post O’ The Day! Indeed, strangeness is no stranger to the ol’ raincoaster blog which I will not link up because Technorati no longer adds status per link but rather per linking blog, so perhaps I should retain my blogging rate but do each single post in a new blog, given that the time to register a new blog is perhaps 2.5 minutes but where was I?
Oh yes. On painkillers.
No doubt the readers at Valleywag are all, like, WTF and many other TLAs besides.
Where was I? Oh yes. On painkillers.
For a blogging injury, of all things.
Imagine.
Where was I?
Oh yes, about to announce the blog post of the day, the person who said, straight or wasted, what I wish I’d said at some point and, no doubt, will do, having conveniently forgotten that I’d stolen it already.
Good artists borrow. Great artists steal.
The smug like to credit free will; the tragic blame the fates. There is a notable pattern throughout the history of writers, philosophers, and drunks. Reader: I happen to be all three.
I don’t care to choose between free will or fate. If I must dole this out to you, I choose chance…
LolShark, LolTrilobites, and Cthulhu, the closet Oprah fan
Steve Jobs = Cthulhu
No, it’s true.
Really.
It makes total sense.
It explains so much.
Think about it.
Once, ages ago, a race of bizarre, loathesome creatures ruled the Earth. Writhing and gibbering in the Stygian darkness of their lair, ravening for the blood of those who worshipped them, this strangely Protean race nearly destroyed the youthful planet in its ceaseless quest to slake their endless thirst for the very souls of the damned.
They were the Great Old Ones. Eventually, they were banished; we can only pray that they never return to debase the race of humans again in horrific slavery and unthinkable perversion.
And in this pantheon, one monstrosity reigned supreme.
Right now, everyone reading is thinking “You’re wrong. These guys look nothing alike.” Of course not, his true identity is obfuscated by the best possible disguise known to man: Ugly glasses. Ugly glasses, made even more opaque by parting his strangely masculine hair differently. If Cthulhu had glasses and parted to the left, these would be virtually identical, right down to the AppleStore he’s crawling out of. Think I’m lying? Take another look.
That may just be the smartest, most dangerous thing I’ve ever read on LiveJournal. But there’s more.
So. Much. More.
Check it out:
Cthulhu: imprisoned in his tomb in Rlyeh, not dead but dreaming.
Jobs: Next.
Cthulhu: The Necronomicon
Jobs: Ayn Rand, The I Ching
Cthulhu: Politics
Jobs: Politics and more Politics
Cthulhu: something of a personnel-retention issue
Jobs: upon regaining freedom, destroys his innocent rescuers
Cthulhu: Lolthulhu
Jobs: Fake Steve Jobs
Cthulhu: advanced wireless telecommunication technology
Jobs: iPhone
Think about it.
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Quiz: what will the movie of your life be called
Here we present a soothing balm to the surprisingly incendiary in a Cute Overload sort of way quiz: which movie do you belong to? featured earlier.
Stolen from Mia’sMadness
There, isn’t that just so much better?
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raincoaster 