Exploding Jack-O-Lantern: the hidden story

HappylaserThe second in our continuing video exposé series on What Really Happened.

It’s that goddam Cheezburger cat!

I knew he was evil!

But who’d have thought he was working for the Empire?

Thanks to Gina for the tip.

Keep your eyes on the skies!

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Mystery pedophile suspect on the run

Canadian Christopher Paul Neil, a 32-year-old English teacher who has taught in South Korea and Vietnam, is being sought in the infamous case of a serial pedophile who extensively photographed himself raping Thai boys as young as six, uploading the 200 + pictures to the Internet, but digitally altering the photographs to hide his own identity (although not those of the victims).

Christopher Paul Neil digitized

His whereabouts are currently unknown, and it is believed that he is attempting to evade capture.

German experts attempted to uncover an identifiable picture of the suspect by undoing the manipulations, giving the above final image. This was enough to get an ID on a suspect, Christopher Paul Neil, who has posted on the Korean Job Discussion Board using the name Peter Jackson.

Christopher Paul Neil

a current picture of Christopher Paul Neil at Bangkok Airport

Among other things, his posts mentioned how he got around the mandatory criminal records check for English teachers.

Police checks are NOT needed to get a visa. Public schools will want one but you should be able to stall them. Often they want teachers SO quickly that they will “wait” for some things. I never gave a police check for my last public school job. I was in Vietnam at the time and getting one wasn’t easy. I delayed and never heard about it again.

and how to hide things from inspectors:

[I]’ve never heard of porn been a problem in Korea. On my first trip there in 2000 I remember reading the customs declaration form while on the plane. I was SO nervous for the remaining hours on the plane because I happened to have a couple Penthouse magazines in my bag. I ended up tossing them in the bin at the airport washroom, only to find out that no one would have found them anyway.

In terms of computers, if you’re worried about any “content” there are several ways to encrypt your drive. A friend has highly recommended Truecrypt, which you can download.

If you want to get rid of old files so no one will see, then simply deleting them will not work. You’ll have to get a program like Jetico’s BC Wipe and “delete with wiping”.

He worked in Wonsam (near Yongin) and then Gwangju in Jeollanamdo, and wasn’t beloved by co-workers, it appears:

I knew him as a pretty normal guy, as far as ESL teachers go. I didn’t work with him (his former school has been informed, and if they know anything, they’re not telling at this point.) To be perfectly honest, I perceived him as the kind of guy who didn’t have much luck with girls and would be comfortable purchasing sex (just based on his overall presentation and some comments he made regarding working girls in Thailand.) I wouldn’t have been surprised if he had had a fake degree or passport– but I would never ever have guessed that he was sexually into children. We didn’t discuss it, and I never saw him around children.

A standard Zeta male.

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okay, um…?

Flying Barn

Don’t look at me. I dunno.
But ain’t no way I’m going in there and milking those cows.

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Osama bin Makeover

Osama bin Makeover

Is it October already? Quel suprise!

Much attention has been paid to the “latest” video which purports to be from Osama bin Laden. Less attention, unfortunately, has been paid to the remarkable differences in his appearance between this video and the “last” video, which was released back in July and shows bin Laden as he appeared back in, say, 2002 or so. In fact, there are no pictures up until this past week which have been identified as bin Laden post-2002.
Naturally, if you’ve been rocking the same look that long, it’s high time for a makeover. From the looks of this “latest” vid, he got one: why, the transformation is positively Swan-worthy. It’s like he’s a different man! Note in particular the Osama bin Rhinoplasty‘d, the Osama bin Browplucked, and the Osama bin Restylaned mouth and nasal folds, the whole region of which appears to be so changed that it is almost as if it belonged to another person.

Almost, eh?

The great fashion blogger (and, not coincidentally my boss) The Manolo has fisked Osama‘s new look over on Pajamas Media, and for once we at the deeply Red ol’ raincoaster blog will encourage you to click over to a site owned by the Great Right Wing Conspiracy to get some good old-fashioned belly laughs. If only Stacy and Clinton could get their hands on this boy!

In the simple phrase, we now have witnessed the arrival of “Osama bin Metrosexual”.

With the freshly dyed beard, it is obvious that here is yet another sorry example of the aging man who has resorted to the Grecian Formula SPF50 in order to stave off the ravages of time; the man for whom the grey beard is not the mark of honor and of the life well lived, but of the irretrievable loss of youth.

Trust the Manolo, Osama, this look is not working for you.

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Vacation Snaps of the Damned

We’ve seen what happens when Death takes a holiday. Now let’s check out Worth1000 and see what happens to the rest of us once he gets back to work.

Nessie attacks

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