Olympic Scandal: Faux BoJo, or No?

Boris Johnson waves the Olympic flag or IS it Boris Johnson???

Another Olympic scandal tops the headlines this morning as it is revealed that, in a substitution reminiscent of the opening ceremony’s switched songstresses and faux fireworks, London Mayor Boris Johnson did not, in fact, attend the closing ceremony at all, but instead was replaced by a sophisticated computer-generated animation.

Bojo gone Olympics, or is it really so?

This shocking swap was insisted upon by the Olympic organizers, who had substantial reservations about Mr. Johnson‘s ability to accept and wave the flag without falling down, offending several of the participating nations, or fatally wounding a spectator in a misguided, yet historically correct, attempt to re-create one of the bloodier Olympic events of the Classical Age. After all, the Mayor’s track record is a very public one indeed.

Bojo in typical mode

The artificial Boris was, in fact, a compromise reached between the organizers and the British delegation. Originally, the Olympic ceremony management had planned to simply replace Mr. Johnson with a more attractive, dramatically-trained, lip-synching version of the same type.

Cary Elwes would do in a pinch. He could pinch me any time!

It is understood that many in the Mayor’s own office have approached the Olympic organizers for permission to continue to use the replicant back home.

Benjamin Franklin on Despotism

Never Forget

So today we get TWO quotes o’ the day, but when presented with a bounty one must simply accept it and share it with one’s friends. Really, this one is a stunner. I’d add my own thoughts, but what Benjamin Franklin and Gore Vidal have said really cannot be improved upon by my words. It would be like painting the Lincoln Memorial or something.

From We Are the Patriots, by Gore Vidal, here is what Benjamin Franklin had to say about the future and the implications of the newly-written Constitution of the United States of America:

“There is no form of government but what may be a blessing to the people if well administered, and I believe farther that this is likely to be well administered for a course of years, and can only end in Despotism, as other forms have done before it, when the people shall become so corrupted as to need despotic Government, being incapable of any other.”

And here is what Gore Vidal has to say in his opening paragraphs:

I belong to a minority that is now one of the smallest in the country and, with every day, grows smaller. I am a veteran of World War II. And I can recall thinking, when I got out of the Army in 1946, Well, that’s that. We won. And those who come after us will never need do this again. Then came the two mad wars of imperial vanity—Korea and Vietnam. They were bitter for us, not to mention for the so-called enemy. Next we were enrolled in a perpetual war against what seemed to be the enemy-of-the-month club. This war kept major revenues going to military procurement and secret police, while withholding money from us, the taxpayers, with our petty concerns for life, liberty and the pursuit of happiness.

But no matter how corrupt our system became over the last century—and I lived through three-quarters of it—we still held on to the Constitution and, above all, to the Bill of Rights. No matter how bad things got, I never once believed that I would see a great part of the nation—of we the people, unconsulted and unrepresented in a matter of war and peace-demonstrating in such numbers against an arbitrary and secret government, preparing and conducting wars for us, or at least for an army recruited from the unemployed to fight in. Sensibly, they now leave much of the fighting to the uneducated, to the excluded.

During Vietnam Bush fled to the Texas Air National Guard. Cheney, when asked why he avoided service in Vietnam, replied, “I had other priorities.” Well, so did 12 million of us sixty years ago. Priorities that 290,000 were never able to fulfill.

Gore Vidal on The Long War and Brainwashing

War is peace!

Where is Metro when you need him? Probably sulking because Blogger won’t let me leave any golden droppings in his comment section.

Stolen from the comments on Gawker:

  • Oh, look what’s lying right here on the coffee table, one of my favorite passages by Gore Vidal:

    “Although the Soviets still wanted to live by our original agreements at Yalta and even Potsdam, we had decided, unilaterally, to restore the German economy in order to enfold a rearmed Germany into Western Europe, thus isolating the Soviet, a nation which had not recovered from the Second World War and had no nuclear weapons. It was Acheson– again– who elegantly explained all the lies that he was obliged to tell Congress and the ten-minute-attention-spanned average American: “If we did make our points clearer than truth, we did not differ from most other educators and could hardly do otherwise…Qualification must give way to the simplicity of statement, nicety and nuance to bluntness, almost brutality, in carrying home a point.” Thus were two generations of Americans treated by their overlords until, in the end, at the word “Communism”, there is an orgasmic Pavlovian reflex just as the brain goes dead.”

    Gore Vidal, Dreaming War, New York, Thunder’s Mouth Press, p.117-118.

Bonus points for the following as well:

  • “When she was running for the Senate, Hillary’s psephologists discovered that the one group that really hated her was white, middle-aged men of property. She got the whole thing immediately — I heard she said, “I remind them of their first wife.”

What Will We Do Tonight, raincoaster?

puppies

Chihuahuas are creepy. Chihuahuas in turtleneck sweaters can be up to no good. Watch your ankles!

raincoaster’s celebrity lookalike

No Face. Iz not so bad akshuly. Iv stil got my poet tree

Kaonashi (No-Face)
A masked, cloaked spirit who feeds on the emotions of others.

I DID try. I tried it twice. And each time I uploaded a photo of my beaming mug, the thrice-accurst meme-jockeys in the nth circle of hell where automated “funny kontent” is generated snickered amongst themselves and sent back, “Sorry, no faces were detected in this photo…”

Married To The Sea

Okay. Fine. BE that way. I’ve still got my poetry.