Beaver Shots: Wild Road Beaver

Beaver is, of course, the national animal of Canada, and for good reason: who doesn’t like a friendly beaver? Why, there’s nothing so welcoming to travel-weary tourists as the sight of a naked beaver straddling the dotted line in the middle of the highway, greeting the newcomers with what passes for wild abandon here in Canuckistan.

You’ve heard, perhaps, of the Canadian who asked the US border guard to say “Please?” He got pepper sprayed.

And a few years ago there was a lineup at an ATM in Montreal. A Canadian got to the front of the line, got his money from the machine, said “Thank you,” to the machine…

And the American in line behind him beat him up.

Why Online Dating Never Works Out

Because this is where it starts, people. And it doesn’t get any prettier from there.

On the plus side, he does say you can still fuck other guys when you’re dating him. Because…well…you’d probably prefer to.

A Valentine!

What is it they say? Anything more than a handful is a waste? I’m sure this is what they’re talking about.

Peggy and Viola Valentine

Happy Balentines Day!

Stolen from April Winchell, but in the true spirit of raincoaster, from me to you: won’t you be my Balentine?

Happy Balentines Day!

Happy Balentines Day!

and another thing…

Married To The Sea

For fans of flamewars, of which there is rumoured to be an overrepresentation around these parts although who knows, eh? the following transcripts, taken verbatim from the Twitter accounts of your fine blog hostess, mineownself, and John Berringer, will pay handsome dividends. Apologies for not threading them properly: I’m way lazy, yo. Some say these should be private messages, but since when have I ever been accused of an overabundance of … what’s the word … discretion?

For those of you who, quite sensibly, find you have quite a sufficiency of drama in your own lives without bothering your head about anybody else’s, you may click here for a random, and almost 62% likely to be aggro-free, post from the past.

And now, the transcript of raincoaster, in reverse chronological order (you might wish to read from the bottom up). At a certain point I just closed Twitter and went off and did my work; you can tell virtually the exact moment if you read his stream. His (considerably more amusing) stream is just below mine:

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