Art Cop!

Everyone’s heard of the fashion police (they were even handing out tickets here in Vancouver a couple of years back, but they must have stopped since nobody’s tried to arrest me recently) but what about art cops? And I’m not talking about the Bureaucratocracy that runs the galleries; I’m talking about actual men and women of action, prowling around, making sure that art is paid the respect which is its due, whether that’s busting the kneecaps of some thug who tries to stash his gum underneath the Louise Nevelson or this:

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Crime Pays: Fundraiser for the Federation of BC Writers

Cross–posted from the Shebeen Club

Who: The Federation of BC Writers and the Shebeen Club

What: a wicked good fundraiser for the Fed

When: Monday, March 16th, 6-9pm

Where: The Vancouver Police Museum, 240 East Cordova Street, Vancouver

Why: it would be criminal to miss this party!

Crime Pays film noir femme fatale

Wanted: YOU!

Come help the Fed celebrate 32 years of getting away with murder. Whether infiltrating schools, divvying up swag, or distributing subversive publications, the Federation of BC Writers has been operating unchecked in our province for decades.

Do you enjoy the vicarious thrill of rubbing shoulder pads with the Lost Literati of the Wild West, surrounded by instruments of murder and mayhem in the cosy confines of the police museum? Do you have what it takes to make your bones as a Fed member? There’s only one way to find out! Come out to the party and make us an offer we can’t refuse.

Admission: $20 minimum donation includes a drink and appetizers. Click here to register. If you won’t be attending, but would like to support the Fed, you can click the Paypal button in the sidebar to make an online donation in the amount of your choice.

Dress code: Trenchcoat and fedora, deerstalker and cape, jailhouse stripes, uniforms, Bond Villain suits or femme fatale slinkwear all optional but encouraged. Attitude absolutely mandatory.

This arresting experience will feature Western Canada’s first Poetry Brothel (five bucks buys a love poem read to you by a sexy stunner) as well as a Guys and Dolls date auction, so bring your chequebook! Our lineup of lads and lovelies will show the winning bidders the times of their lives, thanks to generous sponsorship from premier local entertainments.

Raffle prize donations, bribes, and sponsorship applications very welcome: please email lorraine.murphy at Gmail dot com. Anything related to crime or the theme of noir is particularly welcome, eg detective books, Martini glasses, etc, or anything black or white.

The Crime Pays fundraiser will be our Shebeen Club meeting for the month of March, so I hope to see everyone there, dressed fabulously and behaving infamously!

Quiz: What would you win an Oscar for?

Um, mebbe. But I reserve the right to be as senselessly dramatic as I choose!


You Would Win Best Documentary Feature


You are very curious about and engaged with the world. Everyone is interesting to you.

You have a variety of interests, and you delve into them quite deeply.

People are impressed by the sheer quantity of stuff you know, and you’re learning more every day.

However, you’re not just informed. You also are very informative. You share what you know in an engaging and interesting way.

Latest U2 Video! Exclusive!

Yes, we at the ol’ raincoaster blog have a world exclusive, the very latest from the greatest rock band the Universe has ever seen except maybe the Beatles and don’t give me that Rolling Stones crap, you just say that because you wanted to sleep with Keef when you were a tween.

Behold, the very latest U2 video, Check Out My Pubes:

Lyrics: Continue reading

Christian Bale the Dance Remix

What could be more perfect? It’s Christian Bale‘s pottymouthed rant from last summer, remixed and set to a bouncy dance beat. Positively Beyonce-worthy! Click and enjoy, but make sure your boss is either not around or stone deaf first!

via thelondonblog

If, by chance, you can’t stop till you get enough, there’s another one with original lyrics at HolyMoly.