electronik supersonik

via Fark. How did this piece of unrestrained glam rock Boraticism and bad Engerish escape me for this long? Long live Molvania!

Hey baby, wake up from your asleep.
We have arrived on to the future and the whole world is become…

Electronik, supersonik. Supersonik, electronik.

Hey baby, ride with me away.
We doesn’t have much time.
My blue jeans is tight,
So on to my love rocket climb.
Inside tank of fuel is not fuel but love,
Above us, there is nothing above
But the stars above.
All systems gone, prepare for downcount!
5
4
3
1!
Offblast!

Fly away in my space rocket.
You no need put money in my pocket.
The door is closed I just lock it.
(Hah!) I put my spark plug in your socket (Hah! Ha ha hah!)

The sun in sky is bright like fire!
You and me gets higher and higher.
Heart of communication fire!
Only thing can stop us is flat tire.

(Hah! Hah! Ha ha hah!)

Hey love crusader, I want to be your space invader.
For you I will descend the deepest moon crater.
I is most stronger than darth vapor.
Obey me, I is your new dictator.

For you is Venus, I am Mars.
With you I is more richer than all the czars.
Make a wishes on a shooting stars, then for you I will play on my cosmic guitars!

Ladies and gentlemen, fasten your beltseats.
We has commenced our descent.
I trust you enjoy this flight as much as you enjoy this accent.

Now, back on earth, is time for down splash.
Into sea of eternal glory my spaceship crash.
People have arrived for to cheer me from near and far.
And as I bloat, I open door and shout:
I am world’s biggest washed-up superstar!
(Supersonik, electronik)

As for sure as the sun rises in the west, of all the singers and poets on earth, I am the bestest.
Come, let me put ring of jupiter on your finger.
Then, like a smell around you, I will forever linger.

Okay, is time for end, no more will I sang.
Let me take you back in time, I want for you to experience big bang.
Long live space race, long live Molvania.

 

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pic o’ the day: say hello to Mr Blobby!

Ain’t he a charmer? You can see he takes after his daddy. I wonder if it’s true what they say about noses and…

Mr Blobby!

The pic was taken by Kerryn Parkinson of the NORFANZ expedition by the Australian Museum. Mr Blobby is a Fathead (guess where they got the name?) or Psychrolute, and he is obviously loved for his warm personality. Or his staggering wealth; he’s no uglier than Aristotle Onassis, come to think of it.

Mr Blobby rolls with a posse, yo!Hmmm, is he single?

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Colbert Report: eagle porn!

H’yeah, we’re obviously not going to be any more refined today than we were yesterday, but what can we say; yesterday was an awesome day for hits.

Here we at the ol’ raincoaster blog present the Colbert Report‘s timely (see previous post) hard-hitting investigation into the American phenomenon of bald eagle porn. Talk about a national symbol!

“Just like with people!”

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pic o’ the day: fossilized fairy

This genuine antique fossilized fairy from the collection of Takeshi Yamada is the kind of thing that throws Pharyngula and his fellow godless Darwinian crusaders into a frenzy. No doubt the heirs of Arthur Conan Doyle will be purchasing this irrefutable proof of the ancient existence of fairies, should it ever appear at Christie’s or Sotheby’s.

Fairy Fossil by Takeshi Yamada

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holy sheet! panda poo papers path to prosperity

 My god, what is that woman doing to that panda?

Sometimes the headlines just write themselves, eh?

The CBC, your go-to source for all panda-plop monetization scheme updates, has reported that Thailand’s Chiang Mai zoo is selling sheets of beautiful, handmade keepsake paper composed primarily of panda poop. It’s in great demand as a gift item.

“Saw this and thought of you.” How sweet.

When keepers of the country’s panda couple – Chuang Chuang and Lin Hui – tired of disposing the 25 kilograms of feces daily produced by the duo, Prasertsak Buntragulpoontawee came up with the idea of turning it into notebooks, fans, bookmarks and key chains.Pandas just poop too damn much!

“At first the Chinese were very skeptical,” said the head of Chiang Mai Zoo‘s panda unit…But the multicoloured paper products have proven hot selling-items at the zoo, with the the equivalent of about C$9,350 earned to date helping balance the accounts of panda keeping…

Prasertsak said he was inspired by sa paper, or mulberry leaf paper, a traditional, local product which has proven a highly popular gift item in recent years.

“… in the zoo, when people see real pandas and then their product they’re excited and buy.”

I’ll bet. Does Chuck Berry know about this? How about Mark Oaten? I forsee a radical new idea in super-personalized autobiographies…

But has anyone thought of the most obvious application?

TP Panda!

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