from the WOW report, which I found by doing my daily slog in the salt mines, during which I admire my manicure and listen to loud music and eat snack foods and drink refreshing beverages and get paid to read gossip blogs.
It’s a brutal job, but somebody’s got to do it.
Actually, after watching this I couldn’t run: I was laughing too hard. Think of this celebrity-studded SNL chanson d’amour to sexy and 100% heterosexual Iranian President Mahmoud “No Gays in Iran” Ahmadinejad as this generation’s Ebony and Ivory.
“There may be no gays in Iran, but you’re in New York now, baby!”
lyrics tk…oh, here they are, thanks to mlsloudon
They say true love comes only once in a lifetime
And even though we’re from opposite ends of the earth
My heart tells me you’re the one for meMahmoud, I remember when it started, saw you on the news
You hating gays, I was eating food
I was feeling you, and even though I disagree with almost everything you said
You ain’t wrong to me, so strong to me, you belong to me
Like a very hairy Jake Gyllenhaal to me
Mahmoud, make my heart beating out of my chest
my mind says no but my body says yes
You ain’t no threat, the only threat I see, is the threat of you not coming home to me
Our love for each other is like when atoms collide
Can’t express how I feel, and yo Adam let’s rideAnd Iran, Iran so far away is your home, but in my heart you’ll stay
He ran, for the president of Iran
We ran together to a tropical island
My man, Mahmoud is known for violence
Smiling, if he can still do it then I can
They call you weasel, they say your methods are medieval
You can play the Jews, I can be your Jim CaviezelS&M, (?) when we’re wrestlin’
You can be the port that I put my vessel in
So I try to (?) but you can still see me
With your sleepy brown eyes, butter pecan thighs
And your hairy butt… Yeah.And Iran, Iran so far away
Come home, and in my arms you’ll stay
Used to look at the stars and dream
Around the world the same stars we’re seeing
And a twinkle in your eyes MahmoudTalk smooth to me, in the night sky
With you pants high waisted, damn so fly
We can take a trip to the animal zoo
And laugh at all the funny things that animals do
Like Eugene, you got me straight trippin’ boo
Hope you look at my eyes and say I’m trippin’ too
You say (?) but they already do
You should know by now, it’s youYou crazy for this world Mahmoud
So give us another Holocaust all you want
But you can’t deny that there’s something between us
I know you say there’s no gays in Iran
But you’re in New York now baby
So time to stop hating and start living
I guess “Squid” wasn’t a category? And the last line rings totally false: as if most people are smarter than monkeys! Stolen from max.
You Would Be a Pet Monkey |
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You’re very playful and funny, but you’re also moody and aggressive. You’re have the personality of a wild animal, which is both scary and entertaining.Why you would make a great pet: You’re very smart and you know how to charm people Why you would make a bad pet: When you don’t get your way, you’re a bit of a monster What you would love about being a monkey: Playing interesting games with humans What you would hate about being a monkey: Not being quite smart enough to be a human! |
“They had the original bus that Rosa Parks sat in, the one that sparked off the civil rights protests. It’s beautifully preserved. I was going to sit in her seat but there was a black woman sitting there at the time. I thought better of asking her to move.”
An anonymous but sensible Detroit conference-goer quoted in the Guardian
Rising couple the Nyarlathoteps have previously given our readers a peek at the stunningly exotic landscaping features they’ve installed at their new Miami mansion. Now come with us as they take us on an exclusive tour of the interior of their eldritch neo-Aegyptian hideaway.
Their handpainted china, commissioned from a secret Asian workshop “somewhere on the Plateau of Leng.”
Their custom-designed bibelots tables from “the Dark Star beyond Aldebaran,” which is a label so exclusive it is one of which we at L&S have never heard. How exciting!
Their most unusual garden fixtures. This is their play structure for “the frolics” by which we take it to mean they’re planning on having many little Nyarlathoteps soon.
“Oh yes,” says Mr. Nyarlathotep (call me Abdul, he says to our interviewer, graciously) “We are planning to have many, many children, aren’t we, Shub?”
And his wife smiles inscrutably as she strokes one of their collection of sleek, black cats.
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raincoaster 