Welcome to New York, Ahmadinejad

Mahmoud Ahmadinejad Totally Looks Like Jake Gyllenhaal
can not be unseen!

The NYC visit of the President of Iran is as good an excuse as we need to re-post this video. View it quick, before Lorne Michael’s little trolls pry it from the internet’s sadly un-tenacious grasp.

IRan So Far

Lyrics via JustJared

They say true love comes only once in a lifetime

And even though we’re from opposite ends of the earth

My heart tells me you’re the one for me

Mahmoud, I remember when it started, saw you on the news

You hating gays, I was eating food

I was feeling you, and even though I disagree with almost everything you said

You ain’t wrong to me, so strong to me, you belong to me

Like a very hairy Jake Gyllenhaal to me

Mahmoud, make my heart beating out of my chest

my mind says no but my body says yes

You ain’t no threat, the only threat I see, is the threat of you not coming home to me

Our love for each other is like when atoms collide

Can’t express how I feel, and yo Adam let’s ride

And Iran, Iran so far away is your home, but in my heart you’ll stay

He ran, for the president of Iran

We ran together to a tropical island

My man, Mahmoud is known for violence

Smiling, if he can still do it then I can

They call you weasel, they say your methods are medieval

You can play the Jews, I can be your Jim Caviezel

S&M, (?) when we’re wrestlin’

You can be the port that I put my vessel in

So I try to (?) but you can still see me

With your sleepy brown eyes, butter pecan thighs

And your hairy butt… Yeah.

And Iran, Iran so far away

Come home, and in my arms you’ll stay

Used to look at the stars and dream

Around the world the same stars we’re seeing

And a twinkle in your eyes Mahmoud

Talk smooth to me, in the night sky

With you pants high waisted, damn so fly

We can take a trip to the animal zoo

And laugh at all the funny things that animals do

Like Eugene, you got me straight trippin’ boo

Hope you look at my eyes and say I’m trippin’ too

You say (?) but they already do

You should know by now, it’s you

You crazy for this world Mahmoud

So give us another Holocaust all you want

But you can’t deny that there’s something between us

I know you say there’s no gays in Iran

But you’re in New York now baby

So time to stop hating and start living

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Empire, or Humanity? What the Classroom Didn’t Teach Me About the American Empire, by Howard Zinn

Passed along from NagOnTheLake by Metro, here is a thoughtful autobiographical essay by Howard Zinn, a former soldier and current thought leader (what we used to call philosopher, before we decided that old words were old-fashioned).

The Fortress of the Assassins, DESTROYED!

Married To The Sea
marriedtothesea.com

The tragic destruction of the Fortress of Alamut, stronghold of the Assassins, expressed as a charming historical engraving/ironically juxtaposed caption mashup, for your viewing pleasure.

Background, from DamnInteresting:

The story of the Hashshashin, or Assassins, is cloaked in mystery, and much of the truth about them was long ago lost to war and time. Their influence, however, changed the course of history and spawned the very word we use today to describe calculated, politically-motivated murder.

The Hashshashin were formed by Hassan-i-Sabah, a follower of the Isma’ili sect of Shi’ite Islam. Hassan left his home in Cairo over a succession dispute between two heirs to the Fatimid Caliphate. After choosing the wrong heir to support, Hassan found himself escaping to Persia after spending a short period in a political prison. Determined to avenge himself upon the Fatimids while also wiping out his traditional Sunni enemies, Hassan sought and found the ideal stronghold: the fortress of Alamut, also known as “The Eagle’s Nest.” Located northwest of Tehran, just south of the Caspian Sea, Alamut was an imposing sight. Nestled atop a 2,100m mountain with only one near-vertical approach to the fortress, the Eagle’s Nest was nearly impregnable.

Nearly.

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I Ran

Actually, after watching this I couldn’t run: I was laughing too hard. Think of this celebrity-studded SNL chanson d’amour to sexy and 100% heterosexual Iranian President MahmoudNo Gays in IranAhmadinejad as this generation’s Ebony and Ivory.

“There may be no gays in Iran, but you’re in New York now, baby!”

Can’t we all just get along?

lyrics tk…oh, here they are, thanks to mlsloudon

They say true love comes only once in a lifetime
And even though we’re from opposite ends of the earth
My heart tells me you’re the one for me

Mahmoud, I remember when it started, saw you on the news
You hating gays, I was eating food
I was feeling you, and even though I disagree with almost everything you said
You ain’t wrong to me, so strong to me, you belong to me
Like a very hairy Jake Gyllenhaal to me
Mahmoud, make my heart beating out of my chest
my mind says no but my body says yes
You ain’t no threat, the only threat I see, is the threat of you not coming home to me
Our love for each other is like when atoms collide
Can’t express how I feel, and yo Adam let’s ride

And Iran, Iran so far away is your home, but in my heart you’ll stay

He ran, for the president of Iran
We ran together to a tropical island
My man, Mahmoud is known for violence
Smiling, if he can still do it then I can
They call you weasel, they say your methods are medieval
You can play the Jews, I can be your Jim Caviezel

S&M, (?) when we’re wrestlin’
You can be the port that I put my vessel in
So I try to (?) but you can still see me
With your sleepy brown eyes, butter pecan thighs
And your hairy butt… Yeah.

And Iran, Iran so far away
Come home, and in my arms you’ll stay
Used to look at the stars and dream
Around the world the same stars we’re seeing
And a twinkle in your eyes Mahmoud

Talk smooth to me, in the night sky
With you pants high waisted, damn so fly
We can take a trip to the animal zoo
And laugh at all the funny things that animals do
Like Eugene, you got me straight trippin’ boo
Hope you look at my eyes and say I’m trippin’ too
You say (?) but they already do
You should know by now, it’s you

You crazy for this world Mahmoud
So give us another Holocaust all you want
But you can’t deny that there’s something between us
I know you say there’s no gays in Iran
But you’re in New York now baby
So time to stop hating and start living

Down the Rabbit Hole: adventures in writing for children

The Shebeen

What:

The Shebeen Club: Vancouver’s Literary Gathering:

Down the Rabbit Hole
adventures in writing for children

Who: Lois Peterson of the LP Wordsolutions

When: 7-9pm, Tuesday, September 18th

Where: The Shebeen, behind the Irish Heather, 217 Carrall

How(much)? $15 includes dinner and drink

Why: To learn the Children’s Book market

Down the Rabbit Hole
adventures in writing for children

After twenty years writing for adults, Lois Peterson has written four kids novels in the past six months, and just can’t seem to stop. In her informal presentation Down the Rabbit Hole – adventures in writing for children she will share what has changed since she was a bookaholic kid, what remains the same, and how to tell the difference.

Lois (www.lpwordsolutions.com) is also a creative writing instructor and author of 101 – and More – Writing Exercises to Get You Stared & Keep You Going. While her novel Tansy Here and Now is currently under serious consideration at a wonderful kids’ publishing house, she has reverted to another childhood habit – biting her nails.

Bio: Lois Peterson was brought up in the now-beleagued cities of Basra and Kirkuk (Iraq), ran away from boarding school in her housecoat, and over the years was caught telling numerous lies. So she turned to writing. She publishes articles, essays, and short stories, and in 2007 hopes to finish one novel Who Do You Wish was With Us, and begin another, Just Go. She teaches creative writing to anyone who wants to learn, operates a writing and editing business, and has worked for many, many years for a major public library.

Dress writerly. Berets and/or Team Dorothy Parker tees optional.

More info: email lorraine.murphy at gmail.com

7-7:30 Meet & Mingle

7:30-8 Listen and Learn

8-Whenever “Narnians/Middle Earthers” vs “Hardy Boys/Nancy Drews.”

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