Operation Global Media Domination: the Potter Situation

TIA, babyWell, Technorati loves me, but Google has forgotten I exist. Ah well, they’re probably just getting back at me for misusing their name as a generic verb; these Internet people are such drama queens! It’s true, though: my posts don’t seem to show up on Google at all anymore, although when someone posts them to Digg the Digg post turns up okay. I also appear to be AOL’s favorite referral, which is weird. I mean, people still use AOL?

Technorati situation:

Authority: 270

Rank: 15,898

Which is pretty cool, particularly when you realize that two weeks ago I was at 17,800. That’s the kind of breakthrough I’ve been looking for for awhile. Now to get it back to 14,400, which it was for all of twelve hours before Technorati did a reorg and kicked me back to 18000..

In related news, search terms indicate unsurprisingly that you’re all about the Potter boy lately. Seriously, you can’t wait one more day? The entire top half of the Vancouver Sun yesterday was dedicated to this guy who’d found the book online…like I did about three months ago. Really, I DO need to do a better PR job for myself. Why should some other pathetic internet obsessed nerd get the cover of the paper and not me? He doesn’t even have a blog to pimp out!

But top posts is looking like this lately:

Britney Spears(?) sex tape trailer 235
Harry Potter spoiler di tutti spoiler 131
Harry Potter final paragraph 129
Daniel Radcliffe in Equus 94
Harry Potter and the treasure trail of s 48
mummified fairy remains found!!! 46
beaver shots 40
Linkie o’ the Day: Beautiful Agony 30
the Harry Potter Countdown ticker: get i 17
LolGoth #16: ai iz kleered 4 takeoff! 17

I’m sensing a trend. Also sensing that hits are headed towards a cliff, off which they will throw themselves in about 25 hours. Ah well, Britney will always put out for me…or just about anyone, so it seems.

In related news, nobody on Reddit is interested in Boris Johnson, as mine is the only story on him on the site and nobody’s voted it up. Did okay on Digg, but not Pottermania levels. Diggers, it seems, have more of a sense of humour; whodathunkit?

The benefits of encouraging newbies have manifested themselves, as blogpimping apprentice With Malice was interviewed and managed to plug the ol’ raincoaster blog repeatedly with links throughout the interview. That’s my boy! He also linked to my All Star Hooker Bust post, and why would he do such a thing? Because shrinking violet here asked him to, that’s why. He also liked my Air Sex story and video. Hey, if golf is a sport, so is air sex.

I’m trying to put together a “Virtual Birthday Present Roundup” but it’s frankly too big a project. Archie, ferinstance, posted virtually nothing but tentacles the entire week of my birthday, and every blogger in the Western Hemisphere plus a couple in the Eastern one sent me the story of the giant squid washing up in Tasmania. More on this later…because I know you’ll keep coming back for the sweet, sweet Fake Britney Porn.

Lolgoths finally came through for me, achieving continued readership and a link from this article; the neat thing here is that the Bloggersblog has something like eight different URLs, all with different authority levels, all the way up to 700. And technorati counts each one. I love the scent of SEO in the morning!

Also: snuck past the WordPress.com censors and made it into Top Blogs and Top Posts again today. They’re all partying at Wordcamp and will doubtless delete me as soon as they return.

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reddit be hackt, yo!

reddit headerUnless the “IAUP VIOLATOR” title is one they wear proudly.

Test it yourself: go to reddit.com and look at the header image. Instead of its usual friendly, literate alien, you’ve got a couple of incestuous-looking aliens with some rather emphatic text above them. IAUP, by the way, stands for Internet Acceptable Use Policy. The hacked image is meant to imply that reddit does not abide by basic internet standards.

Is anyone taking credit for this yet? Leave your breadcrumbs in the comments section, please!

UPDATE: reddit be not hackt. Reddit be self-mocking. This is an improvement; now if we could only get them to stop lol-ing and get fixing things.

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lolgoth #18: Trent versus the record companies

Stole this one from lolnin, with which there is much crossover on the LolGoth project, as you can imagine. Worry not, LolGothFans (both of you), I shall get cracking on a new series and post my long-delayed Henry LOLins as soon as I get a decent image program installed on this laptop. MS Paint? I wouldn’t paint a barn with that piece of crap!

ninvisible record executive

Now, with added backstory!

Trent:

It’s a very odd time to be a musician on a major label, because there’s so much resentment towards the record industry that it’s hard to position yourself in a place with the fans where you don’t look like a greedy asshole…I know people have it and I know it’s on everybody’s iPods, but the climate is such that people don’t buy it because it’s easier to steal it.

You’re a bit of a computer geek. You must have been there, too?

Oh, I understand that — I steal music too, I’m not gonna say I don’t. But it’s tough not to resent people for doing it when you’re the guy making the music, that would like to reap a benefit from that. On the other hand, you got record labels that are doing everything they can to piss people off and rip them off. I created a little issue down here because the first thing I did when I got to Sydney is I walk into HMV, the week the record’s out, and I see it on the rack with a bunch of other releases. And every release I see: $21.99, $22.99, $24.99. And ours doesn’t have a sticker on it. I look close and ‘Oh, it’s $34.99’. So I walk over to see our live DVD Beside You in Time, and I see that it’s also priced six, seven, eight dollars more than every other disc on there. And I can’t figure out why that would be.

Did you have a word to anyone?

Well, in Brisbane I end up meeting and greeting some record label people, who are pleasant enough, and one of them is a sales guy, so I say “Why is this the case?” He goes “Because your packaging is a lot more expensive”. I know how much the packaging costs — it costs me, not them, it costs me 83 cents more to have a CD with the colour-changing ink on it. I’m taking the hit on that, not them. So I said “Well, it doesn’t cost $10 more”. “Ah, well, you’re right, it doesn’t. Basically it’s because we know you’ve got a core audience that’s gonna buy whatever we put out, so we can charge more for that. It’s the pop stuff we have to discount to get people to buy it. True fans will pay whatever”. And I just said “That’s the most insulting thing I’ve heard. I’ve garnered a core audience that you feel it’s OK to rip off? F— you’. That’s also why you don’t see any label people here, ‘cos I said ‘F— you people. Stay out of my f—ing show. If you wanna come, pay the ticket like anyone else. F— you guys”. They’re thieves. I don’t blame people for stealing music if this is the kind of s— that they pull off.

Where does that extra $10 on your album go?

That money’s not going into my pocket, I can promise you that. It’s just these guys who have f—ed themselves out of a job essentially, that now take it out on ripping off the public. I’ve got a battle where I’m trying to put out quality material that matters and I’ve got fans that feel it’s their right to steal it and I’ve got a company that’s so bureaucratic and clumsy and ignorant and behind the times they don’t know what to do, so they rip the people off.

Given all that, do you have any idea how to approach the release of your next album?

I’ve have one record left that I owe a major label, then I will never be seen in a situation like this again. If I could do what I want right now, I would put out my next album, you could download it from my site at as high a bit-rate as you want, pay $4 through PayPal. Come see the show and buy a T-shirt if you like it. I would put out a nicely packaged merchandise piece, if you want to own a physical thing. And it would come out the day that it’s done in the studio, not this “Let’s wait three months” bulls—.

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the Harry Potter Countdown ticker: get it for your blog

I stole it from ruhi‘s blog here, so it seems only fair that you steal it from me. If you scroll down in my blog you’ll see it in my sidebar just under the Categories list, and very nice-looking it is, too, if a bit fat for a Dusk template sidebar. Don’t ask me how you design it, I just copied the code. You do the same, and paste it into a text widget, and Dumbledore‘s your uncle!

The code:

<a href="http://www.TickerFactory.com/">
<img border="0" src="http://tickers.TickerFactory.com/ezt/d/

4;10742;430/st/20070721/e/HP+Book+7%21/dt/-1/k/4080/s-event.png"></a>

Now, like I said just copy that code, remove the Enter after the d/ so that that part is all one one line, stick it in a text widget, drop that into your sidebar and it’ll work for you. Note that the printing is black, which can be hard to see, like here. You can make your own customized version at www.tickerfactory.com and set whatever colour you like.

Now I shall turn my attention to supervising the Versace Twins‘ production of badges for the Harry Potter Challenge! To work, slaves!

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white and nerdy, in lego, yo!

Yo, yo! Y’all aren’t gonna b’leev this, up frum tha street:

For context, please see Weird Al’s White and Nerdy (backup dancing by Donny Osmond).

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